Good Night My Pharoah

Allen G. Haywood, Sr. (43 years young) passed away yesterday. Many concerned neighbors sent for police to do a safety check. One neighbor tried the door and it was unlocked. She asked me to go in and check on Allen. There were no breath sounds or a pulse. He was cold as ice. For now it would appear he passed from natural causes. His passing is a devestating blow for our little community. Allen was my best friend. The next person who says, "It was time for him to go" or "We can learn from this" or "God's will be done," I swear to God I'm going to throttle them. I'm going to rip off a limb and beat them with the bloody stump. Just "what" are we supposed to learn from the unexpected death of a dear friend? "Who" said it was time for this compassionate and big-hearted man to die? How can his death be "God's will?" I'm sorry! None of that is comforting in any way. One Rabbi has said, "My God is not cruel; sorry 'bout yours!" There was nothing fair or just about his passing. Right before the mortuary folks took his body to their vehicle, I stood and just gazed at my lifeless friend. Although motionless, he radiated a strength, a dignity that he often spoke of when discussing the Egyptian Pharoahs of the past. I could see that dignity and wisdom even in death. Allen, I'll miss you so much. I loved and cared for you. Today, Love is NOT winning. Good night my Pharoah. JKH